Unlearning Part 1
In the homeschool sphere there has been more and more attention given to unschooling. What is unschooling and why is it important, you make ask? I think the foundational reason many parents choose this approach is to help their kids unlearn bad habits of rote memorization and unmeaningful school habits. Instead, the unschooling approach becomes an attractive alternative in order to produce a holistic approach to learning, leaving children with the freedom to explore and find opportunities for learning that are organic.
I’ve wrestled with this approach for my own children and while I love a Montessori approach to learning for primary grades, which tends to be more hands on, it’s not fully unschooling. I’ve not fully adopted the absolute unschooling approach in homeschooling, but it has permeated other aspects of life. Baby steps, people. I’m trying to get myself together, first.
You see, unschooling would require much unlearning on my part. Redirecting my core beliefs, values, and approaches to life in all its complexities. I’ve been on quite a journey of unlearning and reforming pathways that I believe will serve me and my family well. Even with buy in, and support, it can be incredibly overwhelming and exhausting. As mentioned in previous posts, I’ve been homeschooling for about 12 years, having taught public school 7.5 years before that, in addition to college training to be an educator following a public school education K-12. That’s a lot of habit forming and much society pleasing routes to achieve “success” that I have to break down, unlearn and rebuild.
There are questions I’ve had to consider in how to reroute my parenting approach, my own emotional healing, and holistic living which involves lots of toxic purging.
Toxicity comes in many forms in life. The wakeup call usually comes in the form of illness, or a mental breakdown. For me, it became obvious postpartum right after we begin homeschooling. I don’t think I want to share the details of those moments, they are quite private and painful, even now. However, my diagnosis came as an autoimmune disease, which altered my ability to think and function. Everything was exhausting and humbling. In these moments I have to consider lifelong habits of eating, household purchases, and lifestyle. I had to grieve for a while. I grieved my health and the fact that my once comfortable daily normal was no more. Grief is a journey and in that journey my toxic purging began.
I begin with what I thought would be the most obvious and quick, which was detoxing my physical environment. It took several years and many baby steps, but eventually I did a huge overhaul of purging toxic cookware, dishware, glassware, utensils, food storage containers, bedding, mattresses, cosmetics, cleaning products, laundry detergent, footwear, toiletries like shampoo, conditioner, lotions, deodorant, toothpaste, bar soaps, even to a certain extent linens for clothing and bathing. I hyper fixated on endocrine disruptors and arming myself with as much information as I could. The Wellness Mama podcast became a daily staple. My hyper fixation on detoxing the home became so prevalent that one of the toddler’s most common question was “Mama, is this toxic?” The word toxic was frequently and familiarly used.
I then transitioned to trying to mitigate our toxic load in food. Through the years we’ve cut out and added back certain foods. Convenience and expense of food has played a significant part of our family menu and with a growing family, growing in age and size, along with economic fluctuations has made affording a healthier lifestyle challenging. Not impossible, but oh, so challenging. Enter homesteading. That’s become more of my husband’s realm. He loves homesteading. He’s craved the lifestyle for much of his adult life, but like me, was programmed to believe certain truths. One of those falsities was that homesteading wasn’t a viable or lucrative lifestyle to call yourself accomplished by society’s standards. Nowadays, it’s not easy to make it solely on homesteading or farming and many engage with the land and raising food as an additional job to a conventional career. Homesteading, no sugar coating it, comes with its stresses and hard work, but it’s healthier and gives peace of mind to know your food source. We’re still only a couple of years in, having overwhelmed ourselves with a little bit too much sometimes, but it’s become engraved into our family identity.
These are some of the practical changes that we’ve made, most of which we all assume have an effect on our physical health. They have, but not fully. I still don’t feel amazing or healthy. Living with an autoimmune disease that cripples fertility, while being pregnant with baby 14, makes me think some of those changes have had an effect, but I still feel unwell. It’s become obvious however, that we are a whole person. Health comes from a sound and balanced mind, body, and soul. We’ve been on a spiritual roller-coaster, the most significant part of that so far has been in probably the last four years. Additionally, the journey of addressing mental health and unlearning unhealthy emotional approaches to interaction and relationships is part of our current journey, the next level of unlearning, detoxing, and healing. I’s like to continue this series touching on emotional intelligence, emotional trauma, and spiritual growing pains. For now, let’s recap.
If you are on your own health journey and want to start a natural living approach to life. One that values and promotes a whole food diet, farm fresh food, regenerative farming and ecological healing, low-waste living, functional medicine health approaches, and biohacking my recommendation is to delve into a couple overarching topics listed below.
• Light Hygiene and Red Light Therapy
• Grounding/Earthing
• EMF exposure and how to mitigate it
• Anti-Inflammatory diet
• Non-Toxic Household swaps (I will have a post on some ideas)
• Non-toxic cleaning products
• Natural Remedies
Eventually, the goal of this blog is to provide consultation services. I’m not a medical professional, nor am I offering medical advice. This is my own journey and experience and what I have personally learned and implemented. Any consultation would be practical advice from my lens of experience.